wind is blowing and since the weather hits the end of house where the kids sleep, syd is sleeping with me tonight...I absolutely love these times. When she was small, she NEVER slept all night. She would come to my side of the bed and I would either let her in to sleep with me (which Randy didn't like because he would be left with no room) or I'd take her back to her room - but this would happen every single night. I would get so frustrated with her. Well, speed ahead a couple of years and now those times don't seem to happen. I long for those times when I get to sleep with my daughter. I can see those times quickly fading away never to return and it makes me extremely sad. So much has changed over the past couple years and I just want things to stop. Ryan just got home from going into town for a band thing and it's another thing to remind me of how fast life it going. With him driving, I worry everytime he gets in his truck - it's so convenient for us that he drives but I hate that he does. He's sixteen and will be leaving in two years....aaaaahhhhhhhh. I have a friend who lost her dad last Friday...it's been almost two years since my daddy left this earth and I hate it. I hate absolutely everything about it and I get so sad. I so wanted him to watch Syd grow up - they were good friends and hate having to remind myself that he's no longer here - it just doesn't get easier with time - I think it gets worse. Wow, this has been a bummer posting...so what am I thankful for...ok, yes - stormy nights - they make you grateful for what you have and what is important to hold onto and not take for granted. Now I get to snuggle with my little baby...
